Jarvis Cocker???

I hardly Jarvis know her!

(I know, I know, that was bad)

The jackass that runs mommyheads.com almost forgot to tell you to go enjoy the holiday stylings of the Mommyheads.

Holiday Booty (which I mean in the context of treasure that pirates have stashed away, not the treasure that J-Lo has stashed away):

John Guilt (TAFKA Maestro Echoplex) offers up Santa, Don’t Bring Me No War. Enon gives us Xmas In July, and Gutcult graciously delivers a complete holiday album by lo-fi twee-mongers Season’s Grleekins.

On the non-holiday front, sdb of nedia.net points out that Stay Free’s Illegal Art Compilation CD is available for download.

It’s like a Saddle Creek We Are the World.

A Christmas Album (Bright Eyes) * Pre-order * Internet Only
PRE-ORDER. This item will not ship until Dec 1st. Traditional Christmas songs performed and arranged by Bright Eyes’ Conor Oberst and Maria Taylor along with the help of Jake Bellows, Gretta Cohn, Armand Costanzo, Denver Dalley, Stephanie Drootin, Orenda Fink, Neely Jenkins, Jiha Lee, Andy Lemaster, Mike Mogis, Matt Oberst, Stephen Pedersen, Blake Sennett, Macey Taylor, and Nick White. All proceeds to benefit the Nebraska AIDS Project. Available only at saddle-creek.com – not in stores.

Track Listing:
1. Away In A Manger
2. Blue Christmas
3. Oh Little Town of Bethlehem
4. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen
5. The First Noel
6. Little Drummer Boy
7. White Christmas
8. Silent Night
9. Silver Bells
10. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
11. The Night Before Christmas

How To Get Headbutted In The Face

First, find out way ahead of time about the small Future Bible Heroes show at the Warhol. Score tickets to said show. Upon arrival in Pittsburgh, take a quick peek at the City Paper and discover that the Divine Comedy is playing in town the same night as well. Suffer minor stress wondering if it’s possible to catch both shows.

Next, proceed to the Warhol, take your seat right in front of the stage, wonder why none of the other hundred or so people there took those seats, then relax with your drink. Choke on drink briefly when Claudia, Stephen, and Chris walk onto the stage and announce, “this is our friend Neil Hannon, of the Divine Comedy. They’re playing at 10 at the Club Cafe, so rush on over there after the show…” Then, sit back and watch them perform “All Tomorrow’s Parties” with Neil Hannon. Enjoy the rest of the Bible Heroes set, snicker at the witty stage banter, and observe the clever juxtaposition of the Edie Sedgwick footage playing onscreen with the funny sad lyrics.

Then, rush across town to the Divine Comedy show, take your seat at the table right in front of the stage, wonder why none of the other hundred or so people there took those seats, then relax with your drink. Thoroughly enjoy the Divine Comedy’s set, with it’s casual, easygoing feel, and stare dumbstruck as you witness one of the best shows you’ve seen all year. Toward the end of the set, when Neil mumbles “Hmm, what to play…”, blurt out “Songs of Love”, and witness him say, “Yes, Songs of Love, that’s the one…”

Then, after the set, walk past a drunk guy at the bar, just as he whips around at 900 miles per hour in order to tell a punchline. Make sure your head is perfectly aligned with his as he whips around, then stagger back a few steps when his skull smashes into your cheekbone, opening a nice bloody split just below your eye. Listen to the guy apologize profusely, and when he offers to buy you a drink, say, “Nonono, don’t buy me a drink, let’s just do a shot.” Let him choose the type of shot (he will choose Jager), drink it down, bid farwell, go home, pass out, and wake up at 1:45 the next afternoon with a hangover and a swollen, tender cheekbone.

That, my friend, is How To Get Headbutted In The Face.

File under “News That Is Most-Assuredly Of Interest Only To Me”:

TEENAGE FANCLUB are set to release a career-spanning best of on November 11. Titled ’4,766 Seconds – A Short Cut To Teenage Fanclub’, the album contains 21 tracks, 3 of which are new:

The Concept
Ain’t That Enough
The World’ll Be OK*
Everything Flows
Star Sign
Mellow Doubt
I Need Direction
About You
What You Do To Me
Empty Space*
Sparky’s Dream
I Don’t Want Control Of You
Hang On
Did I Say*
Don’t Look Back
Your Love Is The Place Where I Come From
Neil Jung
Radio
Dumb Dumb Dumb
Planets
My Uptight Life

**** SPECIAL ESOTERIC ADDENDUM ****

I’m sure that if I told Max about this, he would simply say:

“a-hinh, a-hinh hinh hinh! That Sucksssss!”

Q: What do you get when you combine the Flaming Lips, Beck, Charles Allison, and Wilco?

A: You get my last weekend.

Q: Now, how about Enon, Bright Eyes, Azure Ray, and Lambchop?

A: Right, it’s my upcoming week.

Rock and Roll. Hoochie Coo.

Back from Halifax, back from the Pop Explosion.

Had a great time, met some great people, saw some great shows, got really drunk.

Highlights included:

2 awesome sets from Hot Hot Heat
A fantastic solocoustic show by Joel Plaskett
and
An honest-to-goodness jaw-dropper performance by Royal City

For your enjoyment:

Now I remember why good shows bypass Columbus: because Columbus blows. Columbus is a town where any of a hundred local AC/DC-cover bands (that’s essentially what most of them are) can pack a venue, while an amazing band like the Bigger Lovers plays to a crowd of 2 (me and my girlfriend).

These guys rocked the hizzy. Buy their records.

Dissed thrice by Vanderslice

The grand tradition of good shows completely bypassing Ohio’s capital city, Columbus, has been brought to a new level by Mr. John Vanderslice, who has chosen to come oh-so-close-but-not-quite to Columbus 3 times in 3 months:

09-16 Cleveland, OH – Grog Shop (with Spoon!!!)
10-01 Cleveland, OH – Beachland Ballroom (with Dismemberment Plan!!!)
11-03 Cleveland, OH – Grog Shop (with the Mountain Goats!!!)

darn.